Leading from the front and middle
•Sharing vision and purpose for team direction and organisational messaging•Setting expectations •Giving feedback and having difficult conversations•Providing praise and acknowledge•Planning for development•General interaction and engagement
Active listening is a technique used to support effective communication. This is where we move beyond simply listening; to listening where we seek to understand.
|Enquiring|| •Open questions – ‘what’, ‘how’, ‘tell me more’, ‘what else’. Monitor use of ‘why’.
•Closed questions – to check for correct understanding – invite a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ response. Use cautiously.
•Active questions – “What else?”, “Can you help me understand why you think that?”
|Paraphrasing|| •Repeat back or summarise meaning in your own words – avoid interpreting or ‘parroting’.
•“So you think that what they did was unacceptable...?”
|Reflections emotions|| •State what you sense the speaker’s underlying feelings seem to be – without judgement. Pick a feeling which they will be willing
•“You seem to be feeling quite frustrated about this...”
|Reflecting meaning and emotions|| •Combine the above two.
•“So it really surprised you when they said that and now you’re not sure what to think...”
And these are four things that Active Listening is NOT :
|Advising|| •Attempting to be helpful by ‘solving’.
•“If I were you, I’d...”
|Probing|| •Seeking out what you see as necessary information – often so that you can solve.
•Can also feel like interrogation – “So why did you…?”
|Interpreting|| •Trying to be aware of the speaker’s ‘real’ motives – second guessing.
•“You’re just saying that because…” “What you really mean is…”
|Evaluating|| •Agreeing or disagreeing with (or judging) what the speaker is saying.
•“You can’t say that!” “You don’t want to feel like that.”